Updates..

So I haven't written in a while and guess I should fill you in on what's been happening.. Lets see.. I made it through the weekend that my Ex's Family came to town. I stuck with my decision to not see his mom or family that wanted to see me though. I didn't feel that this was a good time for it. This was his weekend.. They were celebrating his Graduation for College, as well as having an Engagement party. They needed to keep their focus where it belonged- that was his special day.. So I will meet up with them at another time when Im in their area.

I did find out some frustrating news though- My ex is not leaving and moving back where he came from after all. He did not get offered a job from the company that he did his internship with. So now Im stuck living here in the same city as my ex and his fiance' till either they leave- or I leave. I really just wanted my space, I gave him his space and now its my turn.. I just want to be able to live my life and not worry about running into them.. Is that so much to ask?? Get out of My City! I want my Life Back...

Oh and of course I have been talking to my best friend still.. He's doing well.. Didn't move out of his house after all though.. Plan fell through.. Im thinking its a small blessing in disguise though because with his fire job not being his fulltime job right now- he cant really afford it at the moment. But he is still single and still asking me to come visit.. I know I will just kick myself the day I get the call that he met someone, and they are in love and getting married.. Why did I wait so long.. I hate it when all the signs point to yes but fear holds me back..

I guess I better really get working on myself. I need to build up my confidence in so many areas of my life.. I wish that I could just be happy with myself.. but at this point in my life- Im not at all.

Monday December 26th I will begin working out. I don't care if I cant make it to the gym- I will do a tape at home, I will run around the block, I will do something to get myself in better shape. I will to stick with it this time.. for my health, confidence, and pride in my appearance. Wish me Luck!!!
My New Motto: Nothing Tastes As Good As Being Thin Feels.