One Small Step...

We all have different kinds of friends.. like the ones that we see all the time and can talk to about any and everything.. or the best friends that we have known for years but have managed to grow apart in many ways..This weekend one of my very best friends of 16 years was in town.. I really wanted to see her but was hesitant. She has become a very different person the last few years and though I love her to death- she has changed in some ways that are not good. She used to hate being around her mom because the lady is just hateful and says the meanest things to people. Now my friend has become this way as well. So now when I see her, she almost always makes some rude comment about me. Lately, I have really been trying to work on me, and myself perception of myself. Im trying to build my confidence and self esteem. When she emailed me and said that she would be out with her mom on Saturday night.. as much as I wanted to see her- I just dont want to deal with the thought of the 2 of them ganging up on me. People who know your biggest insecurities and sit there and just run you in the ground.. Are those really good friends? So this weekend, I kind of surrounded myself with people that do make me feel better and are good friends to me instead. I feel bad about not seeing her- but hey sometimes you gotta do whats best for you, right??

and Yes I did talk to HIM this weekend.. We talked off and on all weekend but really got a chance to talk tonight and it was so nice. He mentioned my possible trip to his area... I told him the situation in more detail and that I was trying to figure out the closest hotel and if it would be best to fly or drive there.. I half joking said well I could just come stay with you and you could drive me to the conference. :-) He made a few jokes about how much he would charge me and stuff.. but in the end he was like yeah you need to come stay with me! I told him good that that was what I had planned anyways..he laughed and I said then you could cook me some good meals. Cause he's such an awesome cook! He said well that could get expensive and I said nah- Im a peanut butter and jelly kind of girl.. except that I would want him to make his famous chocolate cake for me..he laughed and said that he hoped this all worked out and couldnt wait to see me. :-) See, so I finally made a small step towards getting over my issues with him... Who knows- I may back out but at least Im starting to try..